Think Like a Lawyer Don’t Act Like One by Aernoud Bourdrez

Conflict is always around. Everyone will face a conflict eventually. Aernound Bourdez gives us the pleasure writing a list of 75 successful strategies for avoiding or solving conflicts. But instead of listing each one. I will pick only 7 that had a huge impact on my everyday life.

6. Man Is Not Ball

Focus on the problem and not the man within the problem. We sometimes lose focus and instead of attacking the problem we attack the people involved. “It can sometimes work, but then only one person wins and the relationship is ruined”. To truly find a solution that can work, you need both sides to seek a solution.

Separate the opponent from the problem. Tackle the conflict and not the man.

11: Patients Don’t Sue Doctors They Like

The highest indicator that a doctor was going to be sued, as mention by the US insurers were how unpleasant did they make their patients feel. Patients don’t sue doctors they like. Its not only in the medical field where this happens. It happens in every aspect of life. When a person is more liked by people, they will face fewer conflicts with other people.

By listening well, being reasonable explaining and even admitting to mistakes, can minimize the chance of conflicts.

19: Don’t Take It Personally

In life its not a matter of if, its a matter of when people will be cruel and rude to you. However, don’t take it personally, stay calm. Pretend your represent your own virtual limited liability company. All the comments are just water off a duck’s back.

Represent your self with the highest degree of respect. In the end the conflicts you’re. Are they really that important that requires such disrespect towards one self.

37: Count To Ten

Seriously, count to ten. This will calm your nerves. Avoid any unfavourable actions that may be caused.

51: Stick to your Principles

Story time. Winston Churchill turns to a woman asking a woman would she sleep with him for 1 million pounds. She said yes. Churchill responded again would you do it for 10 pounds. Woman angrily responds what kind of woman do you think I am? Churchill remind her we already established you are a whore. Now we’re haggling over the price.

Stick your principles and never abandon for any price. If you do, it will be used against you.

66: Look Beyond Words

Only 7% of your message is expressed in your words. The other 93% is your gestures, facial expression, demeanour, behaviour and body language are far more expressive.

Any word you utter can be neutralised based on what your body communicates.

74: It will be used against you

Avoid making mistakes however trivial they may be. Never mention facts that you can’t prove.

Incident of Princess Margarita who mistaken a nail on the wall as a microphone. Thinking she was being spied by her aunt. Regardless who was right. She lost her credibility.